Him and Her Sex Blog

We talk about sex and sexuality

Him: Topic #21

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As I have mentioned before, in previous podcasts and posts, I am no stranger to the pleasures of anal sex. I have my reservations about this topic though, not in the act itself, but in some of the things I’ve heard people talk about in relation to it. There are so many wonderful things that can be experienced when exploring anal sex, for any orientation or gender.

For some reason I constantly hear about how much anal sex hurts, but this has never been my personal experience with the act. If you take a phallic shaped object, and try to slam it into the anus with no preparation of course it will hurt. In fact, this can cause bleeding and tearing of the mucus membranes. As my good friend ‘Artemis” says, “When you shove something up your ass, make sure to lube up and stretch everything before hand. Also, if it hurts, you’re doing it WRONG.”

I’ve always looked at anal anything, when you are inserting something at the very least, as something to take your time with. Start getting ready at LEAST a week before hand, two if you want to be totally safe. Start with something small, like a finger. Lube it up and just play around back there for a while, there are nerve endings around the anus that can incite great feelings if you softly run a finger over them.

When you decide you want to start inserting your finger make sure you’ve used the bathroom before hand and have washed the area. If you have a diet that had lots of leafy greens, this should clean you out pretty well. If you’re partner can’t get over a little poo when fucking you in the ass, then your partner shouldn’t be doing any fucking back there. Lube up your finger and slowly insert it, take your time and never rush.

After the first finger you can slowly start moving up to more fingers, when you have two in you can start to carefully scissor them, which will help to stretch everything out. A good rule of thumb is that if it hurts, don’t do it again. As you continue to explore and play around, you’ll find that you can add more and/or bigger things over time.

This leads me back to the point of pain. If you prepare properly for any anal escapades, there should be NO PAIN WHATSOEVER. I can’t stress this enough, there is no reason for there to be any pain when you have anal sex. When you play around with your backdoor, it should be fun and pleasurable. Never, unless that is the goal, should it be painful. So, go forth my readers and diddle your backsides, and if you so choose, tell me how it went!

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