This blog is about Sex and Sexuality, as you should know by now, and what better topic to kick off season 2 of the blog than one that is surrounded with so much confusion. Asexuality is so hard to understand because, as far as I can tell, there is so much variation within the community. The definition of Asexuality for one person, can be completely different from the definition given by another person.
I think that the hardest part for me to understand is the inability for an Asexual person to feel sexual desires. I feel like this is something that most non-asexual people take for granted. Stop right now and close your eyes. Think about someone that you like, someone that you would like to date, not remove the sexual aspect of the attraction from the equation. Do you see just how much of our attractions and emotions are built up around the desire to sleep with the other person?
Don’t get me wrong though, I read the info post; Asexual’s do feel arousal and attraction to other people. The distinction, as far as I can gather, is that with those things there is no desire or need to become physically intimate with another person. Having spoken to someone who identifies as Asexual for this weeks podcast, I can tell you there is definitively still the possibility for sexual arousal.
Now, while all of that is very well and good, I haven’t yet talked about how I actually feel about Asexuality. I can make this very simple, it doesn’t bother me at all. Sure it’s a very confusing topic, very intricate and individualistic in nature, but that doesn’t make it any less valid. I absolutely believe that the only reason there is so much confusion, and in some cases blatant distain for, the Asexual community is a lack of public exposure to the topic.
Overall, I personally think that while strange to me, asexuality is harmless and as valid as every other sexual orientation. Every asexual person that I have ever met has been sweet, nice, willing to talk, and without fail just like you or me. I love my asexual friends, and I know that they deserve as much respect as the rest of us. Asexuality is real, deal with it and move on.